pop tarts are not kleenex
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
