So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
