don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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