At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize