i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
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Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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