BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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