that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm getting married
To pizza
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
