Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
