You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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