god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Randomize
