Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
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