You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
