Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found the puke drawer
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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