We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
