.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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