wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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