But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
