Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
