Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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