The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize