Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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