I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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