So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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