can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
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