just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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