You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
