he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
