no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Randomize
