u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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