I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
This girl is more easily done than said...
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize