Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
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i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
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I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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