did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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