Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
