Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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