She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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