he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
