i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
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I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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