I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
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couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
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His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist