We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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