i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
i out mim tonsoeep
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