planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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