I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
