New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
