There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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