well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
