dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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