Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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