Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
