I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
