i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
As shirtless as possible
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
